Roy Ashburn was born in Long Beach, California, in 1954, and grew up in San Luis Obispo along California’s central coast. At 8, Roy became interested in public service for the first time, and by the time he reached high school, he was elected student body president of Arroyo Grande High School. Roy went on to earn his BA in public administration at Cal State Bakersfield. While there, he served as president of the Bakersfield Republican Assembly. By 1988, he was serving as Kern County chair for the George H.W. Bush presidential campaign.
During this entire time and for years afterwards, as Roy got married, had kids, and continued to climb the ladder of California GOP politics, he knew he was gay. Years earlier, he had seen what happened when one of his middle school teachers was arrested for “lewd and lascivious behavior” with another man. Roy saw the public shaming and ruination that befell that teacher. Probably accurately, Roy believed he could never be a public servant from California’s deeply conservative Central Valley and be openly gay. He stayed closeted, with tragic consequences.
In 1997, Roy was elected to the California State Assembly. In 2002, he was elected to the California State Senate. Roy stayed in the California Senate until 2010. During his time in Sacramento, he consistently voted against gay rights legislation. He voted against funding for HIV/AIDS, even when his own brother was dying of AIDS.
In 2010, Roy’s life turned upside down when he was arrested for drunk driving on his way home from a gay bar. At the age of 55, he finally came out. He also got sober. Since coming out, he has been able to transform his life from one based in fear to one based in “authenticity, serenity and love.” He has also done a lot of repenting and making amends.
Today, Roy is married to a man named Nattapong Charoenmit. He has three grown daughters and four grandchildren. Roy and Nattapong live back in San Luis Obispo, where Roy grew up, about 135 miles and several worlds west of Bakersfield.