Content Advisory: Racism / Ethnic Discrimination, Sexism / Genderism, Homophobia, Drug and Alcohol Use, Health Struggles
Harriet Miller and Monica Wehrle’s 48-year Midwestern love story is defined by viewing the world as if women matter, as if lesbians matter.
Harriet was born on April 15, 1937 in Warren, Ohio. A middle child of three, with Ashkenazi immigrant grandparents, Harriet’s childhood was spent following her father, a WWII serviceman, around the country. She married young, and by 1966, had three children: Guy, Sari and Kim. During these years she became involved with the Civil Rights and anti-war movements in Skokie, IL.
While working as a public-school teacher In Fort Wayne, Indiana in 1971, Harriet participated in a women’s study group and was “reborn as a feminist.” Her life would change profoundly in 1977, when she was diagnosed with ovarian cancer at 40. She realized she needed to live authentically while she still could and was able to name her love for Monica.
Monica, the middle child of six siblings, was born on September 21, 1948, in Fort Wayne, Indiana. Her family ran a tavern that had been founded by her grandparents. Monica’s whole family was sports oriented.
She remembers her first exposure to queerness when two men moved in nearby. Her mother referred to them as “fairies.” Monica remembers thinking “that’s a good thing, because we’re Irish.” Growing up, Monica got crushes on other girls, but wouldn’t act on them until much later in life. While in undergrad in the ‘60s, Monica met her husband, and they married in 1970. When Monica was the primary financial provider in their relationship, she applied for a credit card at Sears was declined because of her gender. Testifying during the court case that the Fort Wayne Women’s Bureau brought against Sears was a key part of Monica’s feminist awakening. She went on to get her graduate degree from Indiana University Fort Wayne in Public Administration and was working as a grant writer for local nonprofits when she met Harriet.
Harriet approached Monica in 1976 for help with grant writing to raise funds for the Women’s Bureau, as it transitioned from a city agency to an independent not-for-profit organization. The Bureau was defunded by the Fort Wayne City government, because of political backlash and the incoming anti-feminist administration. While they were working on the grant applications both women realized the urgency of their feelings for each other, and they began a relationship.
In 1981, Reagonomic federal funding cuts prompted them to seek alternative income sources for the Bureau. Monica used her expertise and her love of athletics to help create “Run, Jane, Run”, a fundraising event celebrating women in sports in Fort Wayne. At the first festival, Monica was the driving force behind the reunion of the original Fort Wayne Daises, a women’s baseball team that inspired “A League of Their Own.” The event would grow into an 11-day, 19-sport festival attracting 3,000 participants to Fort Wayne each September, the largest amateur multi-sport events for women in the nation.
After leaving the Women’s Bureau in the early 1990’s, Monica and Harriet founded Harmony Associates, a consulting firm. That same year, Harriet received an Honorary Doctor of Humane Letters degree (PhD) from Indiana University FW. In 1995, they went to work with Aon Consulting and found the time to travel around the world for the next 29 years.
In 2014, they became plaintiffs in the ACLU Indiana class action suit against Indiana’s ban on same sex marriage. On July 25, 2014, Harriet and Monica got married while celebrating ACLU’s historic win. In 2023, the city of Fort Wayne recognized Monica and Harriet’s contribution to women and the LGBTQ+ community with the installation of a four-story mural.
Now in their senior years, they live in the Midwest, surrounded by love from their children, nephews, nieces, grandchildren, grandnephews and grandnieces while continuing the fight for social justice.

